Donald Trump wants $5 million from Bill Maher. On Monday night, Bill offered Donald $5 million towards a charity of his choice if he could prove he’s not the “spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan.” Trump’s lawyer accepted Maher’s offer and wrote:

January 8, 2013

Mr. Bill Maher

Real Time with Bill Maher
  CBS Studios
  7800 Beverly Boulevard
  Los Angeles, CA 90036

Dear Mr. Maher:

I represent Mr. Donald J. Trump. I write on his behalf to accept your offer (made during the Jay Leno Show on January 7, 2013) that Mr. Trump prove he is not the “spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan.”

Attached hereto is a copy of Mr. Trump’s birth certificate, demonstrating that he is the son of Fred Trump, not an orangutan. Please remit the $5 million to Mr. Trump immediately and he will ensure that the money be donated to the following five charities in equal amounts: Hurricane Sandy Victims, The Police Athletic League, The American Cancer Society, The March of Dimes, and The Dana-Farber Cancer Institute.

Regards,

Scott S. Balber